Reasons for Being Trans #190

Why did I become a woman?

Because an extremely unlikely quantum mechanical event caused me to randomly turn into one. A physicist later described it to me like this: whenever you shuffle a deck of cards the odds of you getting the order of cards you end up with is approximately 1 to 80 × 10⁶⁶ (The Factorial of 52). You beat odds greater than the number of molecules in the Milky Way Galaxy every time you play a round of Crazy Eights. While randomly turning into a woman was highly improbable it'd be even more improbable for weird stuff like that to never happen.

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Reasons for Being Trans #158

Why'd I become a woman?

Because the oracle at Delphi said I would and I've read enough Greek tragedies to know that trying to avert a prophecy will only lead to it happening ironically. Obviously the only sensible thing to do was to bite the bullet and get it over with. In hindsight I can't help wondering if having my prophecy come true only because I intentionally fulfilled it just adds another layer of irony. Fucking oracles.

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Reasons For Being Trans #224

Why did I become a woman?

Well, I used to be the boss of this really tough gang, The Man-Skinners, but then they caught me with what was left of my enemies and I had to do hard time in the big house. Luckily, they'd just started this special program where you could get paroled early. All you had to do was let them emasculate you like they do raging bulls and stallions when they want to get them settled down. Ever since the castration they've had me living as a woman to help me cool my temper down. After all, 9 out of 10 prison inmates are men so I figure this is a great way to stay out of trouble.

Reasons for Being Trans #214

Why am I trans?

Well, it all started a thousand years ago when I was between reincarnations. I thought of all the men and women I'd been in my countless previous lives and decided I'd really like to try something a touch more exotic. It was another twelve incarnation before I finally worked up the nerve to take the plunge! Of course, transsexual rebirths are in high demand amongst bored, novelty-seeking spirits between incarnations, but it just so happens I'd gotten top grades at Plato's Meno Memorial University of Omniscience so I was a shoe-in for the position.

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Reasons for Being Trans #171

Why'd I change genders?

Obviously it's 'cause I was so God-damned manly. I was such a dead butch manly man that all the other guys were reduced to cowering pantywaists in my presence. A real man can't stand that kind of sycophancy. It's not enough to be a man amongst men, alpha of the alpha males. A real man needs challenge and struggleTransitioning into a woman was the only thing left to give all the other guys a fighting chance at competing against my studly mojo.

Besides, after a while you just get sick of all these sexy lingerie models licking beer off your muscles. You start shouting, "Get off me bitch! I'm trying to chop firewood for the cabin where I wrestle my bears!" But it's too late. The pheromone addiction's already got them.

Reasons for Being Trans #294

Why am I trans?

Since gay marriage has became legal in Canada it looks like changing genders is going to become compulsory for all men very soon. I decided to transition early to stay ahead of the curve and ingratiate myself with the Canadian Communist Party. Ever since it forced free and universal healthcare on everyone to extend its stranglehold on power it's seemed like a good idea to stay on their good side. I for one commend our glorious Feminist matriarchs for their wise and beneficent recognition of the only reasonable plan for true gender equality. Hail to the Socialist Commonwealth Confederation of Free Democratic Canadian Peoples!

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